What Is Delayed Ejaculation?
Delayed ejaculation, also known as retarded ejaculation, is a misleading name as it actually describes a condition in which a man is unable to ejaculate at all. In some cases, he may be able to reach orgasm but only after an extended period of time (more than half an hour of intercourse). A healthy man would normally ejaculate after only 2 or 3 minutes of intercourse. If he is completely unable to ejaculate and he has not yet had a family, then this obviously becomes a fertility concern.
What Causes Delayed Ejaculation?
There are a variety of medical and psychological causes. If this is a life long problem and the man has never ejaculated, he should investigate to see if he suffers from a congenital abnormality or other physical abnormality. This may be correctable with surgery. Other physical problems include neurological (nerve) disorders which would require a neurological examination or reactions to medications. If you or your partner has a pre-existing medical condition and is taking medication, there are a number of drugs which can cause delayed ejaculation, such as anti-depressants like Prozac and anti-psychotic medications like thioridazine. In that instance, stopping the drug will normally correct the problem. However, you should always talk to your doctor before stopping taking your tablets in case there is any adverse effect on your health condition. Some drugs need to be reduced gradually because of their addictive effect. Your doctor can advise you on this and may also be able to replace your medication with one that does not delay your ejaculation.
Psychological problems include: previous sexual abuse. If a man has traumatic memories of sex, it can prevent him from having an orgasm, which may feel like losing control of himself. Marital problems are also a cause, particularly if there has been an infidelity or some type of sexual humiliation. Phobias about sex, strict upbringing and feeling that sex is 'sinful' can also be a reason. Even being with a new partner after a traumatic break up could trigger delayed ejaculation.
What Treatments Are Available?
Your doctor can determine whether or not your delayed ejaculation has a physical cause by doing an examination. If you have a congenital abnormality, you may possibly be referred for corrective surgery, depending on the type of abnormality. If your doctor suspects a neurological cause or you have a spinal cord injury, you will be referred to a consultant neurologist for specialist advice. If you are reacting adversely to prescribed medications, your doctor can stop these or give you a more suitable drug.
If your condition is caused by psychological problems triggered by sexual abuse or strict upbringing, you can be referred for counseling and support groups for survivors of sexual abuse. Acknowledging what has happened and seeking help is the first step in recovery. If there is a problem with your relationship, you and your partner can be given marriage guidance and sex therapy. If there is a lot of nervousness around sex and pressure to achieve orgasm it may be necessary to abstain from full intercourse for a while and concentrate on other forms of physical intimacy so that you learn not only how to relax and feel comfortable with each other, but also the type of things you enjoy. A trained therapist can help you and your partner explore this.
The majority of psychological cases of delayed ejaculation are cured after therapy.
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