My fight for correct diagnosis and the struggle to start a family
When I was only 12, I started getting all the burning, pain and itching symptoms of vulvodynia. I assumed it was a thrush infection but it never went away. I had no idea what was wrong with me but kept it to myself as I was too embarrassed to mention it.
4 years later I fell in love with the man I knew I'd marry, so I had to tell him the truth. He helped me seek medical help. What began was a 2 year struggle for diagnosis. I was diagnosed with thrush repeatedly, even though everyone knows you don't get thrush for 4 years. I was told it was cystitis, e-coli infection and even suspected cervical cancer and placed on so many antibiotics that I started to get flu every month. Then they said I had pelvic inflammatory disease and that I may not be able to have children. I sat outside the clinic in tears.
As well as this, the burning pain was so severe that I couldn't have sex or any type of sexual contact without pain that lasted 3 days. It wasn't possible to have intercourse at all and we'd been living together for nearly a year in total celibacy. My partner was understanding but it was terribly lonely not being able to make love with each other when we really wanted to, and as we both wanted a family, it was a huge problem.
The crunch point happened when I went to a gynaecologist and he suggested it was all in my head and that I was afraid of sex. This couldn't be further from the truth. I shut myself in my bedroom for days and refused to get up, I was so depressed, until my partner stormed into the doctor's office and demanded they take me seriously. They agreed to refer me to a dermatologist. In the meantime, we were trying to concieve without penetration (not successful) and using pessery applicators filled with sperm to try and induce pregnancy. This failed also. It was bad enough that I couldn't be a proper partner for my man, but the idea of never being a mother filled me with so much grief.
Eventually my appointment with the dermatologist came through and I was finally correctly diagnosed with Vulvodynia, a skin and nerve damage condition of the vulva. At that time they told me it was for life. So far, it has been. I was given steroids to reduce my symptoms. At first, intercourse was still too painful to attempt, but after a while we were able to finally make love during my period, and a few weeks after this, at other times too. The pain was still awful and I would be sitting in agony in a bathtub afterwards, but at least we could do it at all, and we had a chance to be parents.
Soon after I got a positive pregnancy test! 9 and a half months later, our daughter was born using a total epidural to numb the vulvodynia pain. Her birth actually eased my symptoms due to the stretching of the birth canal and the disease is now controlled using lidocaine.
So if you're having problems with pelvic pain and painful intercourse, please remember that not everything that itches is thrush. If your symptoms persist and you keep being told this, if you are unable to concieve, please keep insisting on a proper investigation of your condition.
If anyone wants to contact me, whom may be struggling with these issues, please do.
